In An Ideal World

Whew – starting my first full week of school and man is reality sucking.  I am loving going back to school – no complaints there.  Feeling very fortunate and know that I  have made the right choice.  HOWEVER, I am freaking exhausted !  What the heck am I going to do when Guides starts ??  Thank the good Lord above that the co-leaders have taken on lots of the work that I used to do or we might have to introduce drinking games at the meetings.  My point ? I had this idyllic little college fantasy of balance and order and structure to my life.  Wow was I deluded.

So far things have actually been going quite well.  I put a lot of prep time in before school started so I had binders ready, outlines printed, books ordered, school supplies sorted, agenda marked out, etc.  I am the poster child for the type-A mature student.  I’m sure I am the complete annoyance of the other students but nananananananana I don’t care.  I have my crap together and I don’t plan to forget where I put it.  Well, at least I thought I did.  But now the assignments are coming fast and furious.  Interview here, create a survey there, analyze legal case studies, develop a press release, etc.  I know I am capable of the work.  I know I will be fine.  But cripes almighty this does not fit in to my little idyllic fantasy of a relatively stress free, oh so organized, on top of everything kind of college experience I was planning to have.  Apparently I took Deluded 101 without even realizing it and graduated Summa Cum Wackadoodle.

I will take a deep breath and recognize that it might take me to the end of this week to put it all together.  I will recognize that it is going to be stressful and chaotic and wrinkle inducing.  I will recognize that I have already learned more than I knew two weeks ago about PR and be grateful for the chance to learn more.  I will also recognize that after careful consideration and confirmation, this is absolutely the right place for me to be right now.  But in an ideal world, XYZ Publishing would have recognized my inherent talents and personally courted me with sonnets and Starbucks in order to entice me to work for them without my even having submitted a resume.  In an ideal world, I would have a hunky little piece of man candy following me around campus carrying my back pack and fetching me tea before the last one had cooled.  In an ideal world, I would have a personal email from each professor assuring of my success in the course and advising me that as I was so brilliant I wouldn’t need to complete any assignments.  In an ideal world I would have thought of taking this career path before I had kids and a mortgage and grey hair.  Damn that reality busting in again.

So as I do not live in any  of the ideal worlds listed above except the one including grey hair and kids, I will store away my little fantasies and use them for storylines in my creative writing.  I’m going to need to be ready when Stephen King comes over for a beer to discuss me ghost writing his next book, acting as his agent and doing the PR…

4 thoughts on “In An Ideal World

  1. I’m a Type A mature student too, in fact sometimes I wonder if I study for the stationary opportunities – unfortunately it’s not all about folders and post it notes (which I found were an essential part of my studying kit & routine!). Time management around assignments is something that we mature students seem to do better than the younger ones, so don’t stress too much, planning using whatever system you prefer is the way forward. Good luck with the assignments.

    • I appreciate that very much. I have a backpack all sorted with a variety of organizing materials. Staples stores just love me 🙂 My personal favorite is the page protector – can’t get enough of those. Add in some colored pens and I’m a gonner. I am finding that I am quite a bit further ahead in the organizing than most of the young ‘uns however they don’t have to balance family, etc. so I guess it evens out. Handing in my first assignment tomorrow and that will be the most nerve wracking. I’m just waiting for someone to discover I don’t really belong in the program after all. Most stress is insecurity based on one level or another isn’t it ?

  2. I think I would be in heaven to go back to school, but I know in reality it would still be School…that place I still have nightmares about. You know the ones -exam time and you haven’t studied….

    • I can completely relate. So far I’m quite calm – only the odd panic here and there. I’m really enjoying it and learning so much I find it crazy to discover how much I didn’t know before !

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