Have you ever had just one of those odd days that flies by and passes slow at the same time ? I felt like I was in a time warp. I didn’t get out of my pj’s until about 230pm and that was only because my kids were coming home. I spent the day in front of my laptop doing homework and only saw sunshine for the hour or so a friend dropped by to chat. I even forgot to eat for hours on end. Just one of THOSE days. Full of perceptions, misconceptions, misunderstandings and misgivings. Overall a day that needed to be done earlier than it was.
On top of the oddness of the day was some conflict. I will confess that I have not been attending yoga at all and this is effecting my ability to deal with stress in a positive and productive manner. I am shorter tempered, more sensitive and in general feeling like Animal when he’s told not to bang the drum. Just a tad strung out. This impacts my perceptions of situations, tone: everything. I think my sugardaddy husband is probably lucky to be working so much right now. He might become the drum …
My conflicts today predominantly stemmed from perceptions. Perception of actions. Perception of duty. Perception of time. Perception of growth. That perception word just jumped all over my life today. I think any day where you are trying to get your 14-year-old son to dress for a grad photo probably portends bad things. I’m still not understanding the whole dress shirt, tie and jeans thing but I guess I’m old-fashioned that way. Another twisted perception.
One thing that bothers me immensely is people’s perception of me. Especially when it is negatively impacted by no action of my own. I will qualify that by saying for the most part, I’m quite oblivious to what people think of me. In fact, unless I know you really well or you are going to pay me gobs of money to work for you, I don’t really care. I am who I am and just like Popeye I see no reason to apologize. I do my best to put forth a positive perception but for the most part I just stumble along.
Perception of time is one I sometimes struggle with too. I think I have all the time in the world to get something done and so lollygag. Or I freak out and get tons of things done at once as I think I’ll have no time. Time is so slippery. It floats by with no effort, slowly trickling around the clock face, ticking the minutes by as we rush thither and yon. Time perplexes me on days like today. Where did it go when I don’t even remember where it started …
As I read this post and wonder if it’s wise to put out in to blogland, I am wondering about my perception of how tired I actually am. Are we able to accurately judge our perception of a situation when hearing the siren song of the pillow ? Are we able to adequately articulate our thoughts and feelings when the sand in our eyes is gritty with determination to close the eyes we struggle to keep open ? Can we honestly say that being sleep deprived has no impact on how we perceive things ? Given that I’m doing the head-bob as I write, I’m going to vote no.
I guess my point is this was a bit of a buggery day. Between group projects, individual projects, guide projects, some home projects and personal projects time is done. Time is over for this day. In fact this day ended 40 minutes ago and I didn’t even realize it. So in fact this day is now that day that is no more. Hmm – interesting. Perception appears to be a phantom smoke of a thing influenced by unseen forces and the Sandman alike. I guess this is what happens when you burn the candle at both ends. You forget to see the light.