Once upon a time, my Cliff Claven-esque brain grabbed on to the fact that your body goes through a complete change every seven years. I seem to recall that your bones are brand new, hormones go through a wacky phase, personality does a bit of shifting – the whole shebang. You can choose whatever metaphor in nature that works for you: butterfly, lizard, bear. We go through a fundamental change be it seasonal or otherwise inspired. I’m 42 this year so using my much advanced math skills that means my bones are only 6 years old ! Parts of me are wearing down while other parts are very shiny. My seven-year switch is starting out with a lot of changes this time. Here’s to hoping the less shiny bits can keep up.
For the longest time, I thought my life was going to end at 42. It terrified me. I have no idea AT ALL where this came from, how it developed, etc. I do know I went through a period of significant change 20 years ago where I lost my father, my grandfather, my grandmother and my dog in about a three year span. It got to the point where I didn’t want to answer the phone too early in the morning and that freaks me out to this day. Don’t call me before 9am if you REALLY don’t have to. IT FREAKS ME OUT BADLY. Maybe it was a subconscious attachment to that much maligned Mayan prediction about the world ending this year. I can tell you when the discussions started about how it wasn’t a prediction of the world ending but more of a global shift in consciousness, I was quite relieved. Don’t judge me – I’m a bit weird.
A few years ago, my idea about my 42nd year changed. It was gradual. Maybe it was the space of time where nobody close to me died. A reprieve from death if you will. Don’t test the phone thing though – that is still bad news. My 42nd year also became about change. I wasn’t sure what or how. I just knew it was going to change the rest of my life. At 41, I went back to school full-time to pursue a dream career. Guess when I graduated ? 42. Hmmmm … maybe those Mayan’s were on to something. It could still go sideways but by the time my worst fear would be realized, I would no longer have to worry about it. Win, win.
42 is forever going to be the year I finally had great success in school, graduated with high honors and found the confidence to take charge of my career goals. It is going to be the year that my husband no longer has to work so hard just to keep us in groceries. We are both now in careers that we find intellectually and creatively stimulating. It is going to be a year of growth, discovery and fulfilment. In short – I think 42 is going to be my year of a shifting consciousness. The year to embrace possibility, reach for opportunity and commit to living the creative life I’ve never known I needed but am so glad to have found.
I know this all sounds like some bad chick-lit / after school special but believing in beginnings sure beats the heck out of sitting here waiting for the end. While I’ve always found change hard never going through that change would be worse. It’s also never stopped me from doing anything other than committing to regular exercise. I know I can handle hard times and have the “bones” to handle it. I know I am up for just about any challenge though preferably nothing involving a face to face with a bear. My personality has already been positively affected by the amazing people I met at school who brought me out of my cocoon in ways I never imagined. Hormones ? Well yesterday I discovered a wonderful recipe for a brown sugar candy that is a snap to make and satisfies that “IneedsugarnowbeforeIgounholymental” urge that sometimes strikes at times. Maybe this year will not only be about change but resourcefulness. It all adds up to the same thing: 42 is going to be awesome !