My Creative Voice

Trying to add value, make sense of what's coming next and keeping things going in the same direction.

It’s All Your Fault

4 Comments

My daughter, we’ve discovered, has some neck issues.  Other than being a pain in my neck occasionally I mean.  I’m not a huge fan of kids going through life with discomfort so today I took her to visit an Osteopath.  I’m a huge, HUGE, large believer in Osteopathy.  Having felt the healing myself, I am behind them 100%.  As we headed out this morning for her appointment, a commercial came on the radio espousing about how one kids become teens they are too embarrassed to even be seen going to lunch with their parents.  I looked at my daughter and asked if she too had joined the ranks of the mightily embarrassed.  She looked at me and said – “No. You raised us weird. We are not like other kids …”.  I’m still chuckling …

My response to her was:

“Oh dear !  Did I spend too much time with my little muffins taking you to nice day trips and spending quality time together ?”

Vanessa: “yes”

“Oh dear ! Was I too supportive in your formative years and gave you too many hugs ?”

Vanessa: “yes”

“Oh dear ! Do you like your momma and spending time with her ?”

Vanessa: “Yes, but it’s all your fault.  You made us different from other kids …” This of course all being said with the biggest smile on her face.

I took absolutely no offence to the fact that I’ve raised my kids in such a way that they don’t mind still spending time as a family.  They are early in to their teen years but they will still hug me in public.  They will still go out for sausages.  They will still accompany me on the weird little day trips I find around the area.  We still hike together, go to the movies together and go shopping together.  This doesn’t mean that my kids don’t have time with their friends and don’t do these things with their friends.  It just means those commercials with the sullen teens and the despondent parents don’t yet apply to us. Notice I say yet …

My hope is that this will continue.  I recognize over time that my daughter will rely on me less and less and her friends more for information.  Though she did let it be known to her friends that she tells me just about everything so they might want to watch what they say.  I’m hopeful this also continues.  We’ve had some pretty interesting conversations my girl and I and I’m sure there are lots of things she doesn’t share.  Sometimes a little latte (caffeine free of course) will loosen her lips :).  Sometimes she needs to chat while I’m having “me” time and I have to remember that this is a gift.  Losing my “me” time is far less important than her still wanting to share with me. I value that very much and hopefully she does too.

So if not being like other kids means that my kid still want to be seen with me in public, are still up for my wacky adventures to odd places that no one’s really heard about but are glad we visit after and still want to talk to me about things that are bothering them, well I guess I have big enough shoulders to take the blame for that.  Heck, I’ve been blaming myself for stuff for years that I probably shouldn’t have bothered taking credit for.  For this ? I’m happy to say it’s my fault.

Author: Elizabeth Plouffe

Writer, communicator, entrepreneur, tea enthusiast (bordering on fanatic) who enjoys helping others connect. Cookbook reader, cottage lover, book devourer (apparently I make up my own language too) and seeker of the ambition to exercise.

4 thoughts on “It’s All Your Fault

  1. You are a wonderful mother. I never had this relationship with my mother as a teenager, but now she is my best friend. It is great that you have been able to cultivate this relationship with your kids 🙂

  2. Elizabeth I think it’s the other kids who are different. I’m a firm believer that it’s normal and healthy for our kids to want to spend time with us. My son is 17 going on 18 and he still hugs me – often giving me a row if I forget to hug him when I’m rushing out the door. It’s healthy and natural and you sound like the kind of gal who has got a handle on things. Here’s to kids who value the important things in life!

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