I’m not a patient person. Not at all. In fact red lights were designed specifically to annoy me rather than create a safe and harmonious driving experience. Nothing is harmonious when I need to get there and a red light rears its ugly head. It isn’t the only ugly thing at that point. I’m not an erratic driver prone to fits of road rage or anything like that. I just have the unrealistic expectation that red lights know I’m coming and willingly, obligingly, and sweetly turn to green in order to spread that harmony my way. That unrealistic expectation thing ? Yeah, that figures prominently in my life.
I’ve been a Type A forever. In fact you’ve heard about it before. I’m working on it but much like those pesky red lights, some things are hard to change. I do try very hard not to impose my unrealism on others and save most of the heavy beatings for myself. What I find frustrating is the learning curve. This can be in any situation but with a new job, you have to know my expectations are quite high and those red lights aren’t helping.
My desire to learn quickly goes back a long way. A looonnggg way. I’ve always been the one ready to move on to the next thing. If I’ve learned it, then I’m done and why are we still sitting here ? When I struggle to learn things, well, it can get ugly. When I have to learn lots of things at once and I’m not meeting my expectations, well …. my type A can make it hard to recognize what is realistic and what might be bordering on the insanity of the red light scnenario mentioned above.
What I’m realizing is that to keep perspective and be realistic is far more productive than the tight little ball I can wrap myself up in. Recognizing that I am fully capable of learning things but just not at Sheldon Cooper speed is key. Remembering that everybody has a learning curve but some are better at hiding it than I am. Relying on deep breathing and tea when that tight little ball becomes a bit bouncy. All of these things are what makes learning so exciting and getting the kinks out of my neck not quite so hard.
Slow and steady, I’m learning about my job and the amazing opportunities it presents. I’m finding that working with entrepreneurs stimulates my creativity in ways I didn’t anticipate. Discussions about innovative products or services which takes me off on tangents that get my problem solving junkie hopped up. With all the great ideas I’m hearing about, I wonder if anyone is working on that red light problem ?